Damn This Traffic Jam!

It is not the challenges that are getting in your way, it is the way you think about them.

Every day there can be unexpected issues that come up. They can be anything from a bounced check to a major traffic jam. Life is full of the unexpected; that can't be avoided. These are things that you have no control over.

But you can control your thoughts, and the way you react to them. Remember, your conscious mind does not necessarily tell you the truth, and it is not necessarily accurate. It just "reports the news", complete with ego. So of course, everything that part of your mind tells you will be tainted with a personal, "how does this effect ME?" slant. That's what you have to watch out for.

That traffic jam was not created just to piss you off or make you late. The traffic jam JUST IS. Your responsibility is to lead yourself through it with as little drama and heightened emotion as possible. And here's how to do it:

Take a nice, deep breath. I know you don't want to, but do it anyway. :-)

Now, as you are breathing in deeply and breathing out completely, you are not focusing on those incessant thoughts in your head, you are focused on that breath. And as long as you are thinking about that breath, you are NOT thinking about the traffic jam and how it is making you late.

Once you let that breath out, you can tell yourself the truth - that there is nothing you can do about this traffic jam, and it really isn't out to get you. Then you can begin to think in more helpful ways. Is there a way for you to go around it, take a different route? If not, then you'll have to wait it out.

If you are stuck in your car waiting, you still have choices; you can make momentary choices about how you will use this time. This is a great reminder for why you should keep interesting reading material in your car, by the way.

You could make a phone call that you've been putting off - as long as you are not in moving traffic! You could write down important things that you don't want to forget. You could listen to music or talk radio - as long as the talk radio doesn't make you mad all over again! You could imagine that you were in your favorite place, enjoying your favorite pasttime. You could reminisce about past good times.

The point is, even though you have been delayed and your day is not going as planned, you can still maintain a positive outlook and not get de-railed by those random, unhelpful thoughts. This you DO have control over.